A Tale of Two Stories
First off, I swear I am not a pervert - well not the kind you will think about when you read the two stories I am posting about. They both just happened to catch my fancy (it's very easy to catch yet no one seems to want to. Even the wifey - have to chase her....) I digress - excuse me. These two items caught my attention, they are not related and now I am bringing them to you.
Story 1:
On the cover of Babytalk magazine is a picture of a baby breastfeeding. It's from the side - no nipple (little sucker (see what I did there) has it all to himself) and people who read it call the photo offensive and disgusting. WTF!! So the action which is designed by nature and totally normal is offensive and disgusting??? So every woman that breastfeeds is doing something offensive and disgusting?? So what many of these women probably do and have done is offensive and disgusting?? PEOPLE.... NO ONE IS TAKING A CRAP!!!
Story 2:
Those feisty British have done it again. They are holding an event in conjunction with an AIDS/HIV organization that just gets a rise out of me. A MASTURBATE-A-THON. Just imagine.. show up - butter your corn.. wait a little - chat - eat some food - a little hand to gland combat - wait a little - chat some more - gnosh a little - rough up the suspect - wait a little - be smooth with the ladies - pound 5 bottles of Gatorade - give a few lashes to the ole John Thomas, etc... You get the idea. So this Labor Day - we should all get together, hit the festival in the Orange Circle - eat, chat, drink a lot of black and tans from the Irish section (always the best section) then back to my place for a rousing round of Making the Bald Guy Puke for the men and Auditioning the Finger Puppets for the ladies.
WHO'S WITH ME!!!!
posted by birdman @ 6:57 PM
6 Comments:
Don't forget about running off a batch and interrogating the suspect.
When I had my son I decided I would breastfeed him. It was quite an experience I must admit. I was, of course, still a Marine. If we went out someplace (like to the mall), I would often sit down on a bench and feed him. I don't recall a single time anyone seemed offended - male or female. I have witnessed many women breastfeeding and it doesn't ever offend me no matter how much breast I can see. I normally look at them because I am thinking how she is trying to do something good for her baby and it's not always easy to breastfeed. I think people these days just have nothing else to gripe about.
As for the Brits and their insane marathon, I don't know what to say...I'm kind of grossed out. The idea of seeing that stuff spewing everywhere makes me sick. I think it's pure shock value on their part. I've been with many a drunk group of Marines and NEVER has that idea 'come up' (see what I did there?). I'll have to think about your Orange Circle festivities for a bit and get back to you.
What is wrong with those Brits? That organization should not really be holding such an event, should it? It does not seem right AT ALL!
But about the Orange Street Fair - That sounds like FUN! Can we see how much Totally Gay can drink before he pukes & take bets?!?!?!!?
Story 1: I nurse my baby now. I cover up if I am infront of others (who knows who will walk in, RIGHT???) or go to another room. HOWEVER, I have nursed in a mall, grocery store, whenever the baby was hungry...again, I use a blankie to cover, I don't need the world to see my nips! Those who complain are ignorant. I only get crap from my co-workers when I pump. :D But they can kiss my ass.
Story 2: ...so you "get a rise" out of a MASTERBATE-A-THON?? Does looking at other men do it for ya? EEEEWWWWWWWW
Dude up here in frisco there is a spermbank for lesbians!
Did you guys see that 60 Minutes where they found kids born to different couples all over their own city were all related to the same donor??????? There was one guy who was a Dr. and he had 12 'known' kids because the couples kept choosing his sperm to use. I think after the first time it's used, that stuff gets tossed again - (see what I did there???)
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