Time to be 5 Again

Funny Book Titles:

This came up yesterday while chillin with some neighbors and again today at lunch and I thought "Good Times" "Need to Share with Others".

I know there are more but here is what I remember:

• Sliding Down the Poll by Dick Burns
• Yellow River by I.P. Freely
• Under the Bleachers by Seymour Butts
• Yellow Snow by Willie Eatit and Betty Wont (late addition)
  

Sliding into Home:

Again, I know there are more but here is what I remember:

• When your sliding into home and your pants begin to foam it's Diarrhea
  
• When your sliding into first and your pants begin to burst it's Diarrhea

Now I am unsure of third and no clue for second so help a brotha out here!

Finally, I found an old list that I thought was funny so I will bring it to you in sections of 10.

The Top 100 Things I'd Do If I Ever Became An Evil Overloard:

1. My Legions of Terror will have helmets with clear Plexiglass visors, not face concealing ones
2. My ventilation ducts will be too small to crawl through
3. My noble half-brother whose throne I usurped will be killed, not kept anonymously in a forgotten cell in my dungeon
4. Shooting is not to good for my enemies
5. The artifact which is the source of my power will not be kept on the Mountain of Despair beyond the River of Fire guarded by the Dragons of Eternity. It will be in my safe deposit box. The same applies to the object which is my one weakness
6. I will not gloat over my enemies predicament before killing them
7. When I've captured my adversary and he says "Look, before you kill me, will you at least tell me what this is all about? I'll say "No" and shoot him. No, on second thought, I'll shoot him then say "No"
8. After I kidnap the beautiful princess, we will be married immediately in a quiet civil ceremony, not a lavish spectacle in three weeks time during which the final phase of my plan will be carried out
9. I will not include a self-destruct mechanism unless absolutely necessary. If it is necessary, it will not be a large red button marked "DANGER: "Do not Push". The big red button marked "Do not Push" will instead trigger a spray of bullets on anyone stupid enough to disregard it. Similarly, the ON/OFF switch will not be clearly labeled as such
10. I will not interrogate my enemies in the inner sanctum, a small hotel well outside my borders will work just as well

There ya go - give me some help on the first two.